The loss of my oldest sister Angie was one of the most devastating I’d experienced. As a 19 year old college student at the time, I often share how no one in my peer group had experienced sibling loss so I felt alone. Several years later my next to oldest sister Sharon died and it felt like a sunami of grief swept me away to a far away land never again to resurface in a way that seemed managable. This is sibling loss. The bond between siblings is unique and irreplaceable, deserving of recognition and support through all phases of grief. Now enters Annie Sklaver Orenstein, author of Always A Sibling. I had the honor of chatting with her in this episopde of the ‘Can You Just Sit With Me’ podcast on the topic how to sit with Sibling Loss.
In Always a Sibling: The Forgotten Mourner’s Guide to Grief.’ Annie shares her personal story of losing her brother and the lack of resources for those grieving siblings. The episode dives into the complexities of sibling relationships, identity shifts after a sibling’s death, and the often overlooked grief of siblings. Always a Sibling is a must-read for those looking to understand and navigate the complex emotions that come with this profound type of loss.
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Siblings are more than friends, right? They hold a piece of our childhood.
Annie Sklaver Orenstein
In Always a Sibling, Annie uses her own story and those of others to create the empathic, thoughtful, practical resource that she sought. Divided into three sections: With, Without, and Within, it creates a framework that enables the reader to ground themselves in order to process and validate this often overlooked grief. Annie guides readers to capture the memories and emotions of life with their now deceased sibling, then moves to addressing the grieving process in detail as they navigate life without them. Ultimately, readers will find ways to experience their sibling’s presence within themselves and acknowledge their legacy. With practical strategies rooted in proven grief processing techniques, trauma recovery, and psychoanalysis, Always A Sibling truly supports mourners through the unique experience of sibling loss. Get it here.
Main Points
- Acknowledging the Unique Grief of Sibling Loss
- Identity and the Loss of a Sibling
- The Power of Sharing Stories and Research
- Moving Forward and Honoring Siblings
Episode Talking Points
- 00:00 Introduction and Book Celebration
- 00:58 Discussing Sibling Loss
- 01:38 Annie Sklaver Orenstein’s Story
- 02:18 Personal Experiences of Grief
- 05:08 The Impact of Sibling Relationships
- 22:27 Research Insights and Surprising Findings
- 30:22 Navigating Guilt and Imperfect Relationships
- 39:43 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Other Ways to Listen to this Podcast with Annie Sklaver Orenstein:
About the Guest
Annie Sklaver Orenstein is a qualitative researcher, oral historian, and storyteller who has spent over adecade collecting stories from people around the world. Her work has been featured on NBC Nightly News,Comedy Central, Huffington Post, Politico, TIME, and Mother.ly. In 2020, driven by a desire to share these storiesbeyond the walls of corporate America, Annie founded Dispatch from Daybreak, a collection of letters written bywomxn to their earlier selves. She lives in Connecticut with her husband, children, dog, and chickens. Connect with Annie here.
Mentioned in this episode:
Always A Sibling by Annie Sklaver Orenstein