To grieve is to be human. This is my note to self today.
Because I really wanted it to be just a “normal” day today.
But grief met me this morning.
I had big plans to celebrate Dad’s birthday today with homemade pizzas.
That was one of the things that he did with us when we were growing up. So, I thought that it would be great to do with the kids, in memory of him today.
And I woke up with good intentions of not letting grief hit me.
Not letting grief get to me.
But it did.
Because grief is weird.
And just when you think you’re okay.
It just pops up so uninvited.
Because gosh, it’s just so hard to not miss someone, on days like today, on their birthday. Those people who you’ve known and loved your whole ENTIRE life. That were so intertwined and interwoven into the very fabric of your life.
And I wasn’t going to share at all today.
Because sometimes people tend to ‘side eye’ those who grieve.
Particularly those who, by their standards, grieve “too long”. Or those who grieve “too loud”.
Because “we are not to grieve as those who have no hope”.
This is true because we do have hope in Jesus. One that is firm and secure.
I know this well.
But let’s be clear, to grieve does not indicate that we have lost our hope in Jesus. Because you can hold both Jesus and grief at the same time. And let us remember that just as Jesus grieved, we can and must also grieve.
Because to grieve, is to be human.
And denying pain.
Denying grief, won’t help or heal us.
But Jesus can. And He will.
When we acknowledge it.
And when we take it to Him.
Peter Scazzero in his book Emotionally Healthy Spirituality says that “our culture routinely interprets losses as alien invasions that interrupt our “normal” lives.” …”sadly, the result of denying and minimizing our wounds over many years is that we become less and less human, empty Christian shells with painted smiley faces.”
So, I acknowledge grief and I share my stories because I want others to know that they are not alone.
And I share because I don’t want to be yet another “painted smiley face”. Smiling on the outside but hurting on the inside. Or a person that seemingly has it all together.
Because to be honest, that is none of us.
But I want you to see the real parts of me.
That are still growing, healing and learning.
One that experiences pain, grief, sadness like everyone else but takes it all to Jesus. And one that does not have all the answers but seeks God for them.
One that was lost but now found and continues to be transformed by Jesus.
And one that even, in the midst of it all, whether good, bad or ugly, continues to encourage, inspire and point others to Jesus.
I hope that is what you see in me as I share these stories. So today, I’m thinking and missing my dad on his birthday.
And that’s okay.
Because to grieve, is to be human.
Now, I will be sharing more on grief as well as “all the things” that will inspire you to do life better through intentional faith in Jesus, on my “Love Drops with Natasha Smith” Podcast that I am RELAUNCHING this Fall. I hope that you will join me, subscribe here or wherever you listen to podcasts!
