When we are weary in grief, we only see fragments. God helps us to change our perspective.

When we are weary in grief, we only see fragments. Fragments of how things used to be. Maybe fragments of how things should be, fragments of the present, and even of the future. When we are weary in grief, it’s hard to think straight and see clearly. Or even act in ways we normally would.

Have you ever felt as if you were walking in a fog of grief? Like it was hard to process things, hard to see through this thick cloud of grief? If so, you are not alone. It may be the reason we hear people say, don’t make any major decisions on the onset of grief. But the truth is no matter if you recently suffered a loss or if it has been years. Seasons, holidays, and special occassions can trigger grief. To the point of feeling as if it just happened all over again.

Flat-Brain Theory and Grief

In my book Can You Just Sit With Me? I talk through the concept of Flat-Brain Theory. A concept created by James C. Petersen in his book Why Don’t We Listen Better. It illustrates how our emotions may affect us in different ways including cognitively. I applied this concept to how grief may affect us and found that this theory gives great insight and awareness of the affect of grief on our thinking especially how we view things.

But I want you to take a look at this Biblically. Because we know in this life we will have trouble. Thus, there are so many reasons for us to become weary. And when we are weary in grief, we may only see fragments. Yet, God can help to change our perspective. Take a look at John 6:12.

“When they were filled, he said unto his disciples, Gather up the fragments that remain, that nothing be lost” (John 6:12).

This verse comes from the story of Jesus feeding the 5,000. Jesus had just crossed the Sea of Galilee and many people followed him because of the miracles they had witnessed.

It would seem this day not only did Jesus want to feed the people spiritually but he also wanted to feed them physically. Using a boy’s lunch consisting of 2 small fish and 5 loaves. Jesus took what he had, gave thanks, and fed the people. All 5,000 of them not including women and children. What a miracle!

Then, after feeding the crowd, Jesus tells the disciples to gather the fragments. They must have thought, Jesus, what could possibly be left?

John writes, "Therefore, they gathered them together, and filled twelve baskets with the fragments of five barley loaves, which remained over and above unto them that had eaten" (John 5:13 KJV). 

From this miracle we observe how God took what looked like wasn’t enough. A lack and insufficiency. And he turned it into enough. We observe here how God takes what looks like fragments and turns them into abundance. And what I’m finding in my life and on this grief journey is that what I call fragments, God is wanting to show me something. He wants to show me so much more and he wants to show us a different perspective.

What we call fragments, God calls overflow…he calls abundance.

I found this written in the margin of my Bible a few weeks ago as I was reading the book of John as part of a bible reading plan. I’d written this years ago.

My eyes burned as tears made their way through…because it was a Word I needed at this present moment. Because I feel as if so many parts of life are fragmented…like so many things feel wasted. So many things don’t seem like overflow but instead feel like why I even bother, why do I still feel this way, will the grief ever end, is there any point in it all, and Lord, just have mercy. Have you ever felt this way?

The Lord knew that we would begin to grow weary at some point in our journey. And so we are urged to not grow weary in well-doing. And it’s for good reason.

So we find the Apostle Paul wrote, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9 NIV).

I want to encourage you in your weariness to not give up. Because God sees and knows the big picture when we can only see the fragments. He will make all things beautiful in its time. We cannot fathom “the how” God will do it. And “the what” it will look like as his ways and thoughts are higher than ours. But by faith...by faith, we believe that God will. I want to leave you with some promises from God to help when you are weary.

Here are 5 Promises of God to help when we are weary and can only see fragments

1. “He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” (Colossians 1:17 NIV).
2. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV).
3. “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak” (Isaiah 40:29 (NIV).
4. “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake” (Psalm 23:1-3 (NIV).
5. “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10 (NIV).

A Prayer for the Weary

Lord when all I can see are fragments, help me to see the wholeness of your goodness. Help me to see the fullness of your love, of your care, and the bigger picture. Lord, help me to see things as you see them instead of the lens of my lack and weariness. Help me to lift my eyes to the hills where my help comes from. Help me to become fully aware of your strength in my weakness. And help me to acknowledge my help comes from you Lord. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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